Two Mills Touring Park North Walsham

Right, gather ‘round, because I’ve stumbled upon a little slice of Norfolk that’s equal parts charming and ridiculous. I’m talking about Two Mills Touring Park in North Walsham. It’s the kind of place where you arrive expecting a quiet field and instead find a personal invitation to a very British adventure—complete with damp tea towels and accidental bird-watching.

First impressions: “Wait, is that a windmill?”

Yes. The park is named after two actual windmills, which is either a genius marketing move or a cry for help from a 19th-century farmer. One is a towering brick structure that looks like it could star in a low-budget horror film. The other is a quaint, whitewashed beauty that now serves as a holiday cottage. I half-expected a miller to pop out and yell, “Get off my lawn!”

But that’s the charm: history with a side of absurdity. You can pitch your tent right next to a building that once ground grain for Queen Victoria’s breakfast. Or you can marvel at how the windmill’s giant sails would definitely slap your caravan if they still spun. Spoiler: they don’t. Sadly.

The facilities: “Luxury” means hot water and a sense of humor

The shower block is so clean you could eat a biscuit off the floor—not that I’d recommend it, unless you’re really desperate. There’s also a laundry room with a washing machine that sounds like it’s fighting a badger. But it works! And the staff? An absolute delight. They greeted me with a map and the phrase, “The Wi-Fi is best by the reception, love, but don’t expect to stream movies.”

The park has a small shop selling emergency milk, locally made chutney, and a suspicious number of packets of “Norfolk Smoky Bacon” crisps. I ate three bags in one day. No regrets. The motorhome pitches are generous enough that you won’t accidentally elbow your neighbor while adjusting your awning. Unless you’re very aggressive with a mallet.

Wildlife: Where’s David Attenborough when you need him?

Expect to share your breakfast with aggressive robins and the occasional pheasant that struts around like it owns the place. One morning, a massive hare sat two feet from my tent, peered at me, and then judged my choice of cereal. I’m still not over it.

Two Mills Touring Park, North Walsham, Norfolk

Also, the skies above Two Mills are a migratory highway for geese. At 5:30 AM, they honk so loudly you’ll think someone’s testing a broken trumpet. But by noon, you’ll be pointing at them and saying, “Look, Geoff, it’s the Norfolk Air Force!” to your bemused partner.

The surroundings: North Walsham is half an hour from almost everything

The park is perfectly placed for exploring the Norfolk Broads, but don’t get too excited—the nearest river is mostly used by grumpy swans and rental kayaks that leak. You’re also a short drive from the seaside town of Cromer, famous for its so-so crabs and a pier that’s bravely holding on against the North Sea’s best efforts.

Here’s a surprising fact: North Walsham has a medieval church with a leaning tower—no, not like Pisa, but definitely like a drunk friend trying to stand upright. Pop in for a look; it’s free and mildly unsettling.

Finally, the verdict

Two Mills Touring Park is a gem if you like quiet nights, good facilities, and a healthy dose of Norfolk weirdness. It’s not a thrill ride; it’s more like a cozy armchair with a pocket full of crisps. Bring a decent jacket, a sense of humor, and don’t forget to wave at the windmill. It’s watching you.